Friday, March 31, 2017

Getting What You Want

Long time no see! It's been a few months and I can safely say that things have changed just as much as they have stayed the same. We're in a new year now and I'd love to avoid the cringe cliché of "new year new me" however I'm confident that 2017 is going to be, and already has begun to be so very different to 2016 and is in fact a fresh start. I've improved certain aspects of myself and my life and had a few changes here and there involving friendships and goals, however the same anxieties and worries for the future still remain. I've accepted now that this probably won't change but for now I can focus on what I can change. I've learned so much in 2016 and I truly believe it was the year of self discovery for me. Things happened last year that I will never forget - good and bad. I'd like to pass on some things I've learnt to hopefully help you improve your own life and ultimately get what you want:

Be Selfish
Do you feel like you are stuck in an unhappy or unhealthy relationship but you are terrified of being single? Do you and your partner want completely different things from the future but you stay together and hope that their plans change? Do you worry how your partner will cope without you? Please don't waste another moment in that relationship and get out as soon as you can! It will be painful to begin with but I promise you, it will be the best thing you've ever done. Being single is great, go out and have fun with your friends and enjoy life while you're young. There's no point wasting time with somebody you're unhappy with when you could be using that time to find somebody who does make you happy and does want the same things that you want. Again, it is painful but it will work out for the best. 

Don't Ask, Don't Get
This is one of my favourite pieces of advice because it is so true. If you don't ask for something, if you're not direct and forward then there's a good chance that it's not going to fall into your lap unless you're incredibly lucky. If you want that promotion or raise at work, stop waiting for it to happen - ask for it, be persistent. Show them your worth and that if you don't get it then you can go elsewhere. If you want that proposal then tell him how much he means to you and that that's what you want - maybe he had no idea you wanted to get married. This works for almost everything so be confident and show people that you're not just going to wait around for them. 

Detach Yourself From Negative People
Stop surrounding yourself with people who constantly let you down, disappoint you, discourage you from doing what you want, judge you and your decisions, make you feel second best and ultimately aren't there for you when you need them the most. Stop wasting your time with people like this. Detaching yourself from them will honestly feel so empowering and you'll have more time to spend with the people that do support you and truly love you and not just rinse you of your good nature. These people will only bring you down and prevent you from being your best.

Take Control
If you're unhappy in your job or feel like you're going nowhere, then you have to take control and work towards finding something that will make you happy and stop wasting any more of your life doing something you hate. I think people underestimate how damaging to your mental health it can be to do something you hate day in day out. Don't just stay in a job you dislike for the money because although money is important, it doesn't even compare to the happiness you can find getting paid to do something that you actually enjoy.

Never Give Up On Your Goals
This may seem like an obvious one for 'getting what you want' but it's something that I've struggled with and am only just beginning to realise how important it is. I could write a whole post on this (do let me know if you'd like that) but if you have a future goal whether it be a particular career you want or something you want to do, never ever stop trying! If you tried before and it didn't quite work out or people told you it wasn't possible - stop listening to them. I wanted to be a full time blogger but I stopped blogging because I felt like it would take too long to get there.. well guess what? If I hadn't have stopped I'd probably be a full time blogger by now. This is why I'm making a conscious effort to do things that make me happy and work towards my goals more. I'm not having a defeatist attitude anymore because I know that I can do the things I want to do. It's not going to be easy but is anything easy in life worth having?

I have been wanting to write this post for so long now but finally feel confident enough in myself to say that all of this is tried and tested and even if you take one element from this into your own life it will help improve your life in some way. I'd love to hear your thoughts and opinions and if you have any more tips on getting what you want from life please leave a comment because we could all benefit from helping each other. 

Much Love x

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